*New Year, New NAME, New focus + saying NO!

*New Year, New NAME, New focus + saying NO!

*Vulnerability Alert 😉

When I started this blog, I loved the name. Spa time living. Spa was an acronym: self-care promotes ability.

This message and mission were well-received, and I was overwhelmed at the gratitude I received for starting the conversation.

But as much as everyone loved the idea of guilt free non-negotiable self care – we were all struggling with the same issue.

Yes, we… I’ll never claim to have it all figured out.

winterThe issue? Our perceived lack of time.

What is it that keeps taking up so much of our time? How do we leverage our time? How do we learn to prioritize and say no?

While there’s no permanent sense of balance, getting clear on our purpose/passions might be one way to help prioritize and cut through the chaos? Along with saying no.

It’s hard to say no to email & social requests. But have you noticed that “post-yes” regret… or guilt when you find yourself having to cancel? Or maybe you just keep saying yes and then feel overwhelmed or resentful.

Boundaries are tough. Learning to say no, so you can focus on what matters is a lifelong practice. Most of us just aren’t that clear on our priorities and live our lives in response and reaction to the requests of others. This is normal when we are children, but some of us never outgrow the habit.

So I’ve taken a step back from preaching on the importance of self-care, to address the prerequisite: finding the TIME for self-care.

Thus, the new name and new focus (CHAOS CLEANSE).

This decision hasn’t been easy and involved me clearing some big projects from my own plate. And wow, did it bring up the feelings of vulnerability and shame. Which is probably why I pulled out all my Brene Brown books throughout this process! 

After a year of doctoral coursework in an area I’m extremely passionate about, I had to hit pause and say no….or at least, “not now.”

While learning and growth are non-negotiable for me, the structure and constraints of a 100% online PhD program conflicted with my area of interest: how technology as a distraction is impacting our well-being/how can we leverage technology to effectively to develop meaningful relationships with others to encourage deep connection and relationships.

My interests didn’t align with the format of the program, because we had no verbal/video/audio conversations whatsoever, and the irony was not lost on me.

The program commitment was a good 20-30hrs/week as promised, but I slowly started to realize that with such a commitment, it needed to align with my desire to serve and solve real problems, while learning. I needed to be in connection and collaboration, and thus the conversations on the home-front turned to me finding that fit in the workforce vs. the classroom. A place where I can promote inspired living and growth and leverage technology in service of creating better, more connected communities.

So…here’s to a new year and a new name and embracing our only certainty in life: change!

What changes are you facing in the new year? Where do you need to reflect and get clear? As always, I’d love to hear. (Ha, didn’t even mean to make that all rhyme! 🙂 )

Much love,


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